Walking Dead Tomato Heads

Now that everyone’s gotten over the giant tease re: The Finale*, it’s time to dust off my biggest gripe with The Walking Dead.

*SPOILER (highlight this paragraph): I think the cliff-hanger might’ve been more effective (and less cheesy) if they would have just ended the show when Negan shows up, grins, and looks to his bat. Save his monologue for the cold open next season. It would work great to remind us of the situation (seeing everyone’s face, etc).

There’s a lot to love in the show, and there’s a lot to hate. It’s polarizing. I have friends that can’t get enough, and friends who quit after the first couple seasons. I started off marketing INFECTED with the slogan, “Love The Walking Dead but hate the group’s stupid decisions? Decide for yourself and get INFECTED!

But, I suppose that’s a horror convention. Somebody’s gotta go in the house. What I can’t forgive, however, is the ease with which the zombies are dispatched. It’s as if the virus has suddenly melted away bone and replaced the ghouls’ craniums with tomatoes. I get that they’re rotting and slow, but a skull takes a while to rot away and has evolved to be pretty good at its job (protecting the brain).

It’s just physics:

  • If you hit somebody in the head with a blunt object, their head will bounce away. Even a very sharp knife. They’d have to be braced for penetration.
  • You can crack a skull with a wild swing, but then you’ll need a second or third blow.

Now for the fun part. The evidence:

Oh man, my head fell off!

.

I don’t care how much of a bad ass you are, you can’t punch a zombie to (2nd) death.

.

Gushers anyone?

.

I’ll just give you the benefit of the doubt here and assume it got back up again.

.

Two swings and…hey, where’s all the candy?

.

What’s next? Push a bullet through their head?

.

Not just through the skull, *all* the way through. Who is sharpening these crowbars ?

.

Doesn’t get much blunter than a pipe, annnnnnd that’s not how you’re supposed to use it.

Don’t even get me started on knife kills. There was a time when they used to make an effort. Someone would hold the zombie’s head while stabbing it (so it wouldn’t bounce around), or they’d go through the eye, or up the chin (using gravity to keep the walker in place). Now it’s just like pushing your finger through jell-o.

Instead, I’ll rest my case with the best (worst) of the bunch:

[no caption necessary]

Am I being nit-picky? Maybe, but I don’t think so. I get that the show’s theme is “the living are more dangerous than the dead,” but I just wish I was on the edge of my seat more when a zombie is on-screen and rolling my eyes less when it’s dispatched. They’re just soooo easy to “kill” that it seems strange when someone gets bitten or eaten. How come their teeth don’t just turn to mush instead.

Either way, just don’t expect to get off this easy in INFECTED or PATHOGENS.


What do YOU think? Notice the same thing? Don’t care? Have an explanation for me?

Leave me a comment below, and don’t forget to share and subscribe!

Advertisements

5 thoughts on “Walking Dead Tomato Heads

  1. You make a good point, and I’m still a huge fan of the show. I just started your book, Infected, recently and my first zombie did not go down so easily! With the show, we can assume that many walkers have been dead & decaying for several years but aside from teeth (which fall apart while a lot of us unlucky people are still alive) bone rots last – that’s why we can find skeletal remains that are housands of years old! I guess that brings us to the whole suspending disbelief thing, which we have to do for just about any show these days, and a lot of books as well (and, sadly, also the “news” – especially during political campaign season). Have you seen Z Nation yet? Those zombies come in a far wider variety as the show progresses & the writers put a lot of thought into how they get killed. Oh, and Z Nation isn’t afraid to be funny. Humor is a big plus during an apocalyptic world, IMHO.

    PS What is your opinion of readers who happen upon a hiccup in something you have published? Would you want to know, or should the reader ignore it because the reader knows that reading the same paragraph twice while following a particular path just means that the reader has reached the point where they’d have arrived at anyway even if they’d made one of the other decisions a few pages ago?

  2. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Zilla. Don’t get me wrong, I still tune-in every week and I’m enjoying the FEAR spin-off as well. I guess I probably think about these things more than the casual watcher, which makes them bother me all the more. And I have not seen Z Nation yet, so I’ll have to check it out!

    PS — Glad you found your answer, but let me add — this is a necessary evil in certain game mechanics. People aren’t used to reading the same passages over again in a book, but it’s just like getting the same dialogue from a videogame character if you keep bumping into them before progressing to the next chapter of the story.

    • My God in Heaven James, don’t watch Z Nation. It’s two hours you will never be able to get back. I say two hours because after you watch the first one, you’re going to say, “Well, that sucked, but I will give it one more show to be sure.” Did you see Sharknado? Yeah, there’s a zombienado. Sorry if I offend anyone, but this is my opinion: Z Nation is horrible. Embarrassingly bad… This having been said, it has zombies, and if you’re a zombie fanatic, well… There are different types of zombies in season two. Blasters (radioactive and strong), plant zombies, and Murphy’s converts. Oh, and a zombie baby.

      I agree with your points about the tomatoheads. There’s barely any effort anymore. Maybe the actors were getting tired trying to find a weak spot? I couldn’t see your final gif though.

      • But how do you feel about Z Nation?

        The final gif was from the episode where Daryl swings a chain like a whip and three zombies’ heads suddenly split in half. From the same blow.

What do you think?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s